No, you don't understand...

I love to CRUNCH!

Okay, the outside of the bag reads: New York Style Roasted Garlic Bagel Crisps. But it lies. I think I got plain ones. Either that or New York’s idea of “garlic” and mine are so very different. What good are garlic-flavored things if you can’t offend people three seats over with your breath. I might as well have just eaten a marshmallow peep for as much garlic as there are in these crisps. The last batch was perfect. I think this one got mislabeled.

But the truth is, regardless of the garlicky-ness of it, I love to crunch. No, you don’t understand. I LOVE to crunch.

I was crunching something the other day and I said to Kylie, “I love how loud things crunch inside my head.”

“Does it drowned out the voices?” she said.

“You know," I said, thoughtfully, "it does. It really does."