Thursday, December 16, 2010

Inflitrating the Davidson Culture

To study a culture it is best to blend in. This way you can move about practically unnoticed to conduct your study. When studying the Davidson family here are some things to bring to the table:

Watch these movies:

“The Burbs” starring Tom Hanks
  • • “Yo! Rumsfield!”
  • • “About a 9 on the tension scale there, Rube.”
  • • “You’ve had that in your trousers all day?!”

“The Fifth Element” starring Bruce Willis:
  • • “She knows it’s a multipass!”
  • • “Chicken, good!”
  • • “Nice hat.” Corbin. “Ya like it!” Robber.
  • • “Itsa itsa itsa…”

Also, “The Fiddler on the Roof” the original Star Wars Trilogy, Star Trek (old, new, and movies). For the next generation of Davidson’s, you’ll also want to include “Napoleon Dynamite” and “Nacho Libre”

Watch these TV shows:

“Are You Being Served?” It’s important to know what to do when “A glass of water for Mr. Granger!” is shouted from the living room. Also of note are the frequent mentions of Mrs. Slocombe’s pussy.

“Keeping up Appearances”
  • • “Here I sit, completely surrounded by no beer!”
“All in the Family”
  • • “But Edith, we ain’t the McNabbs!”
  • • “I got some of the same blood in me as Katherine Hepburn!”
“M*A*S*H” (Oh so many from M*A*S*H—quoted more often in our household than any of the quotes that Shakespeare has made common in daily communication.)
  • • “But to cut off a man’s legs and steal his drawers!”
  • • “You tell ‘im, Ferret face!”
  • • “Hey, up close you’re a guy.” Flagg. “Far away, too.” Klinger.
  • • “I wouldn’t marry you for five dollars.”
Family Nicknames

• Sherri –Big Shorty
• Marina—Nunu, Murt
• Albert—Howie
• Jeff—
• Chris—Twid
• Maaike— Moat, Major Iceborg
• Brian—brain, Onslo
• Randy—Roy, Willard

These are just a few of the things you’ll need to know before entering the group. So far I have been most impressed by how Michelle infiltrated the group. Not always knowing the movie references she would randomly throw in some of her own. Confusing the Davidsons for a moment but they were quick to accept her as one of their own.

Please feel free to ask questions during your infiltration process. The Davidsons are quite open-minded to accepting new people and are fairly non-lethal unless provoked to stand up for one of their own.