Thursday, July 26, 2007

They Knew What it Was Like to be Roasted in the Depths of the Sloar That Day, I Can Tell You

I was skateboarding the other day. Trying to stall on the curb. Trying to go faster than I’d ever gone before. Trying to hop onto the board. All kinds of things I had never before been brave enough to do. And, just as fate would have it, one of my kingpins broke. End of skateboarding that day. I was sad…but at the same time I thought, “Sweet! I broke my board! I’m a REAL skater now!”

Wait, there’s more.

Daniel helped me…I bought brand new trucks. They’re bright pink to match my hardware! They’re super sweet! I can't wait to try them out!

When Life Falls Apart...Lean on Humor and a Good Friend

maaiketd: You REALLY are a WONDERFUL FRIEND!!!

maaiketd: I just don’t want to kiss you!

maaiketd: HA!

Kylie: good, cuz I don't want to kiss you either, oh beautiful one

Kylie: but I do love you bunches!

maaiketd: hehehe! good. Right now the last thing to kiss my lips is JJ! I wasn't paying attention and SLURP! he got me!

Kylie: EEWWW!

maaiketd: yes! It was really gross!

maaiketd: other than that the last BOY to kiss my lips is Daniel in England...and he kissed me because he is my friend. So my last pseudo boyfriend kiss was in 1995! IS THAT THE SADEST THING EVER OR WHAT!!!!!!!!!

Kylie: no...sad for the SA's (stupid-asses) that don't know what they are missing

maaiketd: :D (super smiley face)

maaiketd: you always know just the right thing to say!

Kylie: i dod my best

maaiketd: you dod really good

Kylie: HA!

Kylie: what do you feel like doing tomorrow?

maaiketd: I feel like drinking large amounts of dr. pepper.

maaiketd: and using lip balm.

maaiketd: and saying the word "hottentot" a lot

Kylie: i like the "hottentot"

Kylie: so...

Kylie: let me rephrase my question

Kylie: what do you want to do with US tomorrow?

maaiketd: Can't we both say hottentot?

Monday, July 09, 2007

So What Am I Supposed To Do, Eh?

Advice to meet men:

Set a schedule! Do your shopping on Tuesday evenings or your laundry on Sunday afternoons! The guy who sees you there once but was a little nervous about approaching you might pluck up the courage when you’re there the next time!

Advice to avoid stalkers:

Never follow a pattern. Never shop at the same time on the same day. Never use the same Laundromat each time you do laundry.