There is no way to explain how my brain screams. I'd like to explain what my brain does, but as I am the only one inside my head and I don't know what a real brain does. I only know my brain. Lately my brain has been screaming. I can't make it stop. I can't turn it off. The only way to get it to be quiet is to sleep.
I want to cry out for help, but I don't know who to turn to. People get tired of helping someone with a mental problem. They'd rather I just "get better." But, I can't. Think of it as a brain tumor. A problem in my brain that I can't fix. People don't expect someone to fix a tumor, but they do expect a depressed person to "fix" themselves. People want me to be "fixed." But I can do nothing about my situation any more than someone with a tumor can.
Please, I beg of all of you, try to understand. I don't do any of this to try to get sympathy. I don't do this to get attention. If I could change it, if I could have a NORMAL brain I would do it in a moment. If I could get my brain to stop screaming...if I could just be normal I would. I can't change it though. What I need is someone to understand that I have a disease. I can not fix myself. I don't want sympathy. I do need help.